54

A FRIEND ONCE, A FRIEND FOR EVER.

arise from a generous motive-that of putting the stranger at her ease, piloting her safely through the numerous quicksands, effecting introductions, and when she is sufficiently at home' with her school-fellows, leaving her to choose her own friends. When this is the case, the action is generous and right; but for a girl to desert an old friend for a new one, merely because she is new, is a sign of great instability of character-a trait most undesirable in one's friends.

Now comes the great question: Are school-girl friendships lasting? or do they really merit the sneer which is usually levelled at them? To begin with :-girls' paths in life lie so frequently in such contrary directions that it is not always possible or even desirable to retain early friendships, though I firmly believe that girls who have been true friends at school have a tender feeling for each other which never wholly dies out. When a girl leaves school she enters on a new life in which it is hardly possible for her school-friends to have a place. With young men the case is different. They are liable to be brought frequently into contact with the friends of their youth at college, in their travels, in business. I do not hesitate to say, that the lasting character of a young man's friendship is due more to this fact than to any especial discrimination in the choice of it. For I utterly deny that there is any reason why a girl's friendship should be less constant or enduring than that of a young man.

Among remarkable instances of the duration of early friendships is that of the celebrated Scotch authoress, Susan Edmonstone Ferrier, for Miss Clavering. They first met at the age of fifteen, and formed an attachment for each other which never died. The wife of the well-known Archbishop Tait cherished throughout her life the memory of the celebrated Miss Marsh, whom she met in girlhood. When afflictions caine upon her she wrote to the friend of her youth, expressing a wish to see her if she had not left London. Miss Marsh had left, but she hastened back to comfort and sustain the mourner. And when Mrs. Tait died, it was of her Miss Marsh wrote: 'My remembrance of her is a dream of loveliness,' referring to

the qualities of heart and mind which had made her friendship so precious a boon.

But of all remarkable early friendships-a friendship begun in infancy and continued through life, which grew in hours of bright prosperity, and shone brighter and more steadfastly through darkness and trouble, which never failed nor faltered through all the vicissitudes of life-that of Mary Seton for the hapless Queen of Scots is the chief. Mary Seton was the youngest of the four Maries chosen by Mary of Guise to be the companions, class-mates, and maids-of-honour to her royal daughter. They were instructed by the same masters, prepared the same studies, ate at the same table, and, in short, were identified with her daily life. When it was deemed advisable to send the young Queen to France, her little playmates accompanied her, and joined in all the gay scenes of life at the French Court. On Mary Stuart's return to Scotland, her young maids-of-honour took a vow to refrain from marriage until she was happily espoused. This vow was preserved inviolate by Mary Seton, who would hear the addresses of no one. When troubles came thick upon the unfortunate Queen, Mary Seton remained steadfastly true to her. In the attempt to escape from Loch Leven Castle, she remained behind to personate the Queen and thus afford her a greater chance of escape. She rejoined her royal friend after her capture, and when she became the prisoner of Elizabeth, Mary Seton went with her to her English prisons, sharing her privations, hardships, and confinement, unmurmuringly. On several occasions she undertook the office of maid to her royal mistress, though she herself was of high lineage. But she disdained not this service of love, nor ever complained that she was compelled to do without it for herself. After some years at Fotheringay her health broke down, and, retiring to France, she sought the seclusion of a convent. Mary Stuart writes touchingly of the loss this was to her, acknowledging the worth and truth of

her character.

A word regarding school-girl enmities. These are generally

56

NOBILITY OF A GENEROUS NATURE.

the outcome of rivalry. It is almost impossible in a large school for such to be unknown. There are always some whose evil tempers, sarcastic tongues, and backbiting or tale-bearing habits, make them at war with the whole school; and necessarily their own worst foes. It is not of them I would speak. They may be dealt with by the multitude, who will see that the harm they would inflict shall be but transitory. But it sometimes happens that there are two girls whose capabilities are about the same, between whom exists a miserable jealousy; not the honest rivalry of each trying to do her best for the sake of right, but a kind of underhand envy which prompts its owner to hinder her rival from gaining distinction, by withholding from her any judicious help, refusing to lend books containing fuller information than her own, and the like. I know that it is almost impossible to banish this rivalry, but let it be generous, worthy, and honourable. Be noble enough to help your rival when you can, and so far as the rules permit. You may lose the honour you coveted by your generosity, but you will gain something far more precious than any worldly distinction. The Girl who can see her rival bear off the prize with a smiling face, and a few brave words of congratulation, is a heroine capable of good and noble actions. It is not possible to help being disappointed, nor to forget how near you were to bearing off the palm yourself, but it is truly generous to refuse to damp your companion's joy, by hiding your disappointment till you are within the privacy of your own room.

I conclude this chapter, Girls, by bidding you, whether abroad, at home, or at school, not to be ashamed to set before your eyes an Ideal, to which it shall be your steadfast effort and endeavour to attain. Shut not your hearts to those sweet and tender influences which grow from the desire to live a true and upright life. Refuse not to share in any work that will better, encourage, or sustain your fellows. And love with an unfailing love all that is pure and holy, all that raises you above the

ld of commonplace, and elevates and refines your views of

Types of Girls in Society-The Bloom of Girlhood too early lost-The Girl of the Period -Character Sketches-George Eliot's 'Dorothea Brooke'-Miss Yonge's 'Ethel May'-Miss Wilford's Gyneth Deshon' Lord Lytton's 'Cecilia Travers' 'Lily Mordaunt'-The Girl Esthetic-The Girl Theological-The Fast Girl-The Girl Mechanical -The Girl who Dances-The Girl who 'goes in' for Gymnastics-The Girl Matrimonial-The Superficial Girl-Quotations from 'Aurora Leigh'-Courtesy the Religion of Common Life-Examples of it in Good and Great Women-Bulwer Lytton quoted-Elements of True Courtesy-Modesty to be cultivated-What constitutes Immodesty— Sympathy an Essential in Society-Sympathy the nearest Faculty to Genius Conversation in Society-Faults to be avoided-Sir William Temple quoted-Individuality of Style and Expression pleasing-Appreciation by Men of Intellect in Girls-Low Voices essential to Good Breeding-Distinct Utterance admired-Self-Respect-The Character of English Women a precious National Possession-Familiarity to be repressed-Duties owing to Society-Cheerfulness to be shown, and Readiness to oblige—Carlyle quoted—Sir Arthur Helps quoted—Long, fellow's Lines on Maidenhood.'

58

TYPES OF GIRLHOOD.

HE individuality of the Girl, owing to the restraint
imposed by social conventionalities, is much less
marked than that of the Boy, and when we meet

with her abroad,' she does not so forcibly attract
our attention. Still, to a sharp observer, the idiosyncrasies of
the various types are obvious enough, and he easily learns to
distinguish between the young lady with a touch of sentiment;
the young lady with a penchant for flirtation; the young lady
who relies upon her supposed personal charms; the young lady
who 'goes in' for fashion; the young lady who attends High
Schools for Girls and learns Chaldaic and Aramaic 'by corre-
spondence; the young lady who reads hazardous novels-in
secret; the young lady with a passion for dancing; the young lady
who is nothing if not musical; the young lady who prides herself
upon her manners; the young lady who prides herself upon her
amiability; and the young lady who does not pride herself upon
anything! Girls are more precocious than Boys, and, therefore,
when, on occasion, they emancipate themselves from the bonds
of social custom, you find that they divide into classes just as
Women do. There seems no interval between the girl and the
woman,, as there is between the boy and the man; no period of
'hobbledehoyism,' no 'calf-stage.' A girl at sixteen or seven-
teen is usually as self-possessed, and as self-conscious, as a young
man of one or two and twenty. So that, in Society, when a
girl has ceased to be 'a young miss,' she becomes perforce
entitled to the treatment we accord to her mamma.
No one
would address 'a young lady' of sixteen as he would a lad of
sixteen, so wide is the difference between the calm and com-
posed creature who converses with you respecting the last
opera, the last sensation, or the last novel, and the awkward,
red-faced lad who has scarcely an idea beyond his cricket or his
skating, the Oxford and Cambridge boat-race, or the latest
exhibition of morbid pedestrianism at Lillie Bridge.

Perhaps some of us would be glad if girls remained a little longer Girls; if they did not so soon cast off the bashfulness and blushes of girlhood; if they did not so soon assume the