Grum. Yau'ft mak fuch a Raut and a Hurly-burly, Maifter come young an' yau'ft no ftay till Pfe here I'fe pay for't aut of my awn Pocket, here bauy another. [Offing Mony. Here's a Rant with a Railazu and a Zu, with a pox. Sir Tim. Monster of a Fellow! [Afide. Take him Confine him in the low eft Part of the Edifice, ev'n in the Cellar away from my Sight way with him, I say. A [Exeunt Servants with Grumble. His Mafter will be here to-Day, and I will demand Ju- Ang. To-morrow, Sir? to-morrow's very foon. Sir Tim. By the Majefty of Pekin, an' you mutter, Huffy, I'll have you marry'd to-Night, and then you'll be out of your Pain by to-morrow. Ang. Pain, Sir? Upon my Word, Sir, 'tis not the matter of the Pain, Sir, nor the Being out of the Pain, that I ftand upon; but upon my Word, 'tis a very hard thing to be forc'd to marry a Man one don't like. to Sir Tim. Moft provokingly impertinent! diflike a Man before the fees him, only in oppofition to - my Paternal Authority. No, Huffy, I know the true Reafon --- 'tis not that you diflike him, but because you like fomebody else; you have fet your Heart upon fome of those vain frothy young Mandarins of that imperial, but abominably vicious City of London, call'd Beaux. Ang. Upon my Word, Sir, Sir.Tim. Be filent, 1 say. For ought I know you design to join your felf to one of that execrable new Sect, which they call the Biters, those Sons of the Serpent that inhabits in the House of Smoak. By the Great Lama, I had as foon fee you marry'd to the Giant Tanfu, who inhabits in the prodigious Mountains of Tartary, and eats a Hundred and Fifty Virgins every Day in the Week, but Fridays and Saturdays, and then he lives upon old Women, as good Catholicks do upon Stock-fifh, by way of Mortificacion. Ang. Well, Sir, you may do what you please with me, but I am fure you fhall never make me forget poor Mr. Fiendly. Sir Tim. Ah ha! Said I not fo? Does it go there? Ang. For his Eftate, 'tis as good as your Mandarin Pinch's; and for his perfonal Qualifications, I'm fure I know 'em too well not to vindicate 'em against any Mandarin in Christendom. I don't know why I should not pluck up a Spirit, and tell this old Chinese Father of mine his own. [Afide. Sir Tim. Why hearken to me, my Daughter; (I will reafon with her) thou hast been bred up like a virtuous and a fober Maiden, and would't thou take the part of a profane Wretch, who fold his Stock out of the Old EaftIndia Company, and fhow'd his fcurrilous Wit in making a Jeft of the worshipful Traders? A fcurvy, idle Varlet! A wicked Varlet! Ang. Well, Sir, if he took his Stock out of one Fund that he was weary of, he'll put it into another that he likes better; and that's what all the young Fellows about Town do, that understand Bus'nefs. Sir Tim. A wicked, wicked Wretch! -He might have put into the New then, if he did not like the Old, but to be of neither! Talk no more of him thou wilt put me into a Chafe, and it will be the worfe for thee. A naughty ill-principled young Man, to be of neither Eaft-India Com pany! Ang Ang. Well but dear, dear Father, will you make me marry this fcurvy Fellow I never faw? Sir Tim. This is immoderately vexatious! good truth I am refolved. Ang. Are you? the Mandarin look to't. -In Why then fo am I, and let Sir Tim. What a prodigious thing is the Education of an English Damfel! Ang. afide] How fantastical is the Difference between an old Fellow's Judgment, and a young Wench's IncliOd! I have a good Mind to fpeak nations! out. To Sir Tim.] I must marry him then, you say? Ang. Well, I fhall make Sir Tim. A good Wife, I hope, Genelewoman. Ang. No but what's all one, fuch a fcurvy, abominable, whimsical, coxcomical, miferable, oddish, exemplary kind of a Husband of him, that the most potent Cham of Tartary, that you us'd to tell us of fo, shan't fhow his Fellow among all the merry Men in his Country and fo I am refolv'd I'll tell him the first time I fee him. Sir Tim. Well! flagitious Age [Exit Angelica. Incontinently this is a most nothing but Difobedience, Impudence, Debauchery, Biting, and all kind of Wickedness -but no matter; I will comfort my felf after the manner of the fage Philofopher Tychung, who liv'd Fifteen Thousand Seven Hundred and Fourteen Years Two Months and Three Days ago, and let the World rub I will fend forthwith to my Correspondent at Canton for a new PagodeI will marry my Daughter to the young Man I have provided for her and after that I will incontinently efpouse the moft amiable Mariana, and engender a Male Off-fpring, who shall drink nothing but the Divine Liquor Tea, and eat nothing but Oriental Rice, and be brought up after B 2 the the Inftitutions of the most excellent Confucius. And I will moreover in the mean time divert the melancholy Faculties of my Mind in beholding the Diversions of this numerical Croydon FairI will behold the moft noble Exercife of Dancing on the Ropes I have beheld it with Delight in the flourishing Empire of China, I will behold it here again. are of the Frequenters of this Place Lipous, or Men of Rank -But lo! here they seem I will falute them ac cording to the manner of the most glorious and wife City of Peking. Enter Pinch, and Scribblefcrabble. Sir Timothy falutes 'em after the Chinese manner. we fhall find the Ladies fomewhere hereabouts Hey! Who have we here! What, are you the Man with the Wax-works? Scrib. By Fe-Fe-Jericho, Sir Timothy Tallapoy. [fide. Sir Tim. Young Gentleman, may the Garden of your Graces be ever flourishing Wax-works. Pinch. What then, the Vigo Plate? Sir. Tim. I am ignorant of your but I delight not in Intentions. [Afide. Scrib. Hufht! Squire, Squire Pinch! Pinch. Oh ho! What, you're the Man that bought the right Italian Fairy that was born at Hampstead? Sir Tim. I am a Mandarin of this Neighbourhood, and deligh in a new Mansion. Scrib. A Wo-Word w'ye. [Afide to Pinch. Pinch. Oh Pox! that's juft at the Town's End, with Bottl'd Ale and Collard Beef over the Door; the SussexHoufe. Scrib. Are you me-me-mad! tell you 'that's craz'd Come away, I this is a poor unfortunate Gentleman He was Mace-bearer to the Lord Chancellor of Moscow, and was turn'd out of his Place for having more Wit than his Master poor Man, Man, happen'd not to be dull enough to be in with that Miniftry, loft his Place, hurt his Head, poor Man! t Finch. Very ftrange, Faith! Od, I'll bite him I never bit a Mad-man in my Life. Scrib. Poo, poo!- Pinch. By the folemn Powers I will tleman, your Servant. Come away. Old Gen Came you Sir Tim. Most flourishing Youth, I congratulate your Arrival at the Village of Croydon from the imperial City of London? Pinch Yes, yes, we came from London. Sir Tim. And do the most ingenious Imparters of Novelty afford any thing that is new? Pinch. There's comical News, Faith, in the FlyingPoft -It's given out and rumour'd, that feveral Great Men, and Beglerbegs in the Weft-Indies, have declar'd for the Rebels in Hungary. Sir Tim. Sir, fhall I tell you? I am not concern'd for any Tranfactions which are or may be in the West-Indies. Sir, you are a Stranger to me, but I deal plainly with you, I am no Friend to any thing in the Weft, and am pofitively refolv'd, Sir, never to have any thing to do with Westminster, Weft-chefter, Weft Smithfield, or the WeftIndies. No, Sir, the Eaft, I think, is more properly the Concern of every good and honest Man.. You take my Meaning, Sir; and if you have any thing from the East Indies, fo Sir, for to tell you my Mind freely, I don't think there is a good moral Man on this fide the Cape of Good-hope. Scrib By Fe-Fe-Fericho that's much! Sir Tim. Always excepting fome of the worshipful Traders to the aforesaid East-Indies. Pinch. Why, Sir, both the Companies are concern'd in the Project, and are to furnish Sir Tim. Sir, let me tell you, they are a wife and a prudent Pinch, Bite! bite! my Dear. |