my Bus'nefs at prefent lyes more properly with the Gentleman of the House.

Sir Tim. Then I notifie to you again that it lyes with me -come, bar Biting, and begin.

Pinch. Good lack! it's much the Lofs of a Place fhou'd do this.

Pray, Sir; no Harm, I hope; by your Leave only.

Sir Tim. Whither wou'd you pass, Friend?
Pinch. Only that way a little

[Afide.

[Going by him.

just in at that Door, that's all I fhall meet with fome of the Family; I won't trouble you, Sir.

Sir Tim. Sir, I have undertaken the difcuffing your Bufinefs my felf, and 'till I have made fome further Progrefs in it the Family fhall not be met with, No, Sir, by the most Potent and Serene Cham they fhall

not.

Pinch. Pray, Sir, let me tell you, this is very uncivil, Sir, -I don't know but I may be in hafte, and fo forth, and may have Occafion to speak with a dear Friend that lies dangerously fick in the House.

Sir Tim. The Manfion is falubrious and healthy; but if it were not, may I fuppofe you to be a Maker up or Preparer of Medicines, or, as the Western Language ren ders it, an Apothecary?

Pinch, Bite! Od I've a good Mind, Tongue's End.

'twas at my

[Softly afide, Sir Tim. Ha! What is it thou pronounceft in fecret? Pinch. Nothing, nothing in the Universe, but only that I beg the Favour of a Word or two with Sir Ti mothy Tallapoy: That's all, as I hope to breath,

Sir.

Sir Tim. Prodigious! How enormously he varies his Fable! Say on. I am he, tho' thou knew'st it before, thou biting Viper thou! I am he nounce, fay on.

Pinch. Oh dear! this is worfe and worfe! he! alas! I wou'd you were but C 4

pro

You

Sir

Sir Tim. Speak, what?

Pinch. Your felf, Sir, that's all, only a friendly Wish, I wou'd you were your own Mani

Sir Tim. Soho! My faithful Servants, approach;

I'll teach you to bite one of the worshipful Oriental Traders in his own Manfion. Would't thou infer that I am distracted, of a Mind not fit to negotiate? Sirrah! I have been thought fit to negotiate and drink Tea with the most excellent Governor of Canton, nay with the Viceroy, and the learned Lipous.

Pinch. Look ye, Friend, I don't fay any Body's mad, but thefe are odd Circumftances, and Moorfields is a good Air for People that lofe Places bout Bus'nefs, to be interrupted, and interrogated, and bambouzled, and not fuffer'd to

Sir Tim. So ho! my Servants!

Enter Servants.

when one comes a

Pinch. Phaw! This is a Jeft indeed! hey day! what's the meaning of all this? Look ye, my Name's Squire Pinch, I come to marry Sir Timothy Tallapoy's Daugh

ter.

Sir Tim. Doft thou bite me with the Name of mine Allie! Seize on him, the Wretch!

[They lay hold on him: Pinch. This is damn'd foolish, faith and troth! Look ye, I am Sir Peter Pinch's Son and Heir, -I am a Man of Wit and Pleasure, I understand the Town, and I won't be us'd fo, for ne'er a Mace-bearer nor a Mad-man in Moscow..

Sir Tim. Incontinently I think thou art diftracted thy felf; but it fuffices me that I know thee to be a Biter, the Name that comprehends all kind of Villany Cou'd the right worshipful and moft fincere, my Friend, Sir Peter Pinch, a Man of his most categorical Principles, engender a Biter! impoffible! out, thou Impoftor!

Pinch. So ho! what's there no body here to take one's part! Sir Timothy Tallapoy!

Sir Tim. Hold him faft.

Enter Mariana and Mrs. Clever.

Clev. The Lovers will be paft reprieving presently I left 'em mumbling over Matrimony with as much Eagerness, as if they were to be happy in good

earnest.

Mar. Very well; now for our Cue here have happen'd as we cou'd have wish'd —

Matters

Sir Tim. Moft exceeding fair, and my very good Friend, my propitious Stars have directed me to the Difcovery of a notorious Impofture, and your excel-, lent Perfons come very opportunely to behold my Ju

ftice.

Pinch. Well, Friend, if he be never fo much Må your fter, and the individual numerical Sir Timothy, I am as much the individual numerical Squire Pinch, as he is the individual numerical Sir Timothy Tallapoy.

[To the Servants: Mar. I must confefs he has a ftrange defigning kind of a Face, I fhou'd be very cautious of trufting fuch a fort of a Man upon his bare Word.

Clev. Dear Sir Timothy have a Care of him, methinks I fee Biting written in his very Forehead.

bit.

Sir Tim. Madam, the fage Orientals are not eafily

Pinch. Oh Ladies, you humble Servant foolish, faith and troth!

thefe Ladies know me.,

foolish Adventure.

Now you

very

fhall fee, Friend

Madam, here's really a

Clev. What does he mean? he addreffes his Difcourfe Blefs me, I'm afraid he's diftracted

to us.

.-how

he looks! For Goodness fake don't come too near him. - They fay 'tis as bad as Poison to be bit by a Mad

man.

Sir Tim. It is, Madam, what we may properly call an egregious degree of Folly mixt with an egregious degree of Impudence 'tis what the Learned in the Western Nations call a Complication.

Pinch. Pfhaw! phoo! this is all fooling! Ladies! Madam! here are a whimsical Set of People wou'd perfuade me my Name is n't Pinch.

Sir Tim. I told your Lady ship what he drives at, he wou'd bite me under a wrong Name.

Mar. And pray, Sir,

is your Name Pinch?

oh dear. - hold him faft,

Pinch, Bite! Bite! Madam.

Sir Tim. You fee, most excellent Lady, you see what he wou'd be at.

Mar. And do you really think, Sir, your Name is Pinch?

Pinch. Nay, Madam, I tell you I'm like to be us'd fcurvily this is all ridiculous! Speak Truth now ----why as if I did n't know one! you This is Biting in

deed!

Clev. Blefs me! my Dear! did you ever fee this Man before?

Mar. Never with my Eyes, Madam. Sir Timothy, let me conjure you to have a care, there is certainly fome very villainous Design laid againft you, this is fome Plot.

Pinch. What is the meaning of all this? Didn't I come down in the Coach with you to-Day? Mrs. Mariana! Madam!

too

Clev. The confident Wretch! He has got your Name Hark ye, Friend, what good does it do you now to counterfeit another Body's Name? Why you cou'd n't think but it muft needs be found out at laft, and then you know the Law is very severe in these Cafes.

Mar. "Tis very probable he had his Eye upon the young Lady's Fortune.

Pinch. Why this is dowright making a Fool of one: I thought you had been more a Gentlewoman.

Sir Tim. Bebee! Do you [To a Servant: and your Fellows take care to confine him in the Cellar I will fupplicate the Mandarins of Juftice that Punish

ment

Punishment may be inflicted according to his Demerits--Away with him.

Mar. I never faw the like in my Life.

Sir Tim, Madam, we live in a flagitious biting Age, and a biting Climate Away with him For my

part I wish I were well turn'd of the Cape of Good

hope.

Pinch. Prithee be quiet, Friend Talk of putting one in a Cellar! Phoo! what a Jeft is that? Nay I won't ftir a Foot, that's flat Help! Murder! Ladies! Why you won't? What, will you pull one's Arm off? You'll anfwer all this----If ever I bite any Body again---- pray ftay--- hear me---[Servants force him off. Mar. Upon my Word I am heartily frighten'd; he make a moft terrible Noife---- I believe the best be to get him out of the House?

1836

way will

Sir Tim. Fear nothing, Lady, I will fo muzzle him. Clev. That he can neither bite nor bellow, 'tis the best Course you can take with him.

Mar. Well, of all the disagreeable things one meets with, nothing is fo fhocking to me as a Biter. You meet with nothing of this kind in China, Sir Timothy.

411111

Sir Tim. Twou'd be Felony, without Benefit of the Clergy.

Mar. Well, they are a polite People! - how agreeably graceful is that Habit of Sir Timothy's, what an Image of the Eaftern Wifdom it gives us!

Sir Tim They are certainly a great People; Arts began with them It is thought the neceffary Sciences of Eating and Drinking were discover'd fome Ages among them, before they were known in Europe.

Clev. Concerning Beards and their Management I have heard indeed ---

Sir Tim. The whole Oeconomy of the Beard was treated of Seven Thousand Years ago, by a learned Chinese Philofopher, in Fifteen Volumes. Ah, Madam, might I but hope for the Pleasure of feeing your Ladyship in

the