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a wife man prefer the knowledge of a troublesome and afflicting truth, before a pleasant error that would cheer his foul with joy and comfort, and be attended with no ill confequences? Surely no man of common fenfe would thank him, who had put it in his power to execute the fudden fuggeftions of a fit of paffion or madnefs; or ima gine himself obliged to a person, who by forwardly informing him of ill news, had caused his foul to antici❤ pate that forrow which he would have never felt, fo long as the ungrateful truth lay concealed.

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Let us then refpect the happiness of our species, and in this light examine the proceedings of the Free-thinkers From what giants and monsters would these knighterrants undertake to free the world? From the ties that religion impofeth on our minds, from the expectation of a future judgment, and from the terrors of a troubled confcience, not by reforming mens lives, but by giving encouragement to their vices. What are thofe impor tant truths of which they would convince mankind? That there is no fuch thing as a wife and just providence: That the mind of man is corporeal: That religion is a flate-trick, contrived to make men honest and virtuous, and to procure a fubfiftence to others for teaching and exhorting them to be fo: That the good tidings of life and immortality brought to light by the gofpel, are fables and impoftures. From believing that we are made in the image of God, they would degrade us, to an opinion that we are on a level with the beafts that perish. What pleasure, or what advantage do these notions bring to mankind? Is it of any use to the public, that good men fhould lose the comfortable profpect of a reward to their virtue, or the wicked: be encouraged to perfift in their impiety, from an affurance that they fhall not be punished for it hereafter.

Allowing, therefore, thefe men to be patrons of liber ty and truth, yet it is of fuch truths and that fort of li berty which makes them jultly be looked upon as ene mies to the peace and happiness of the world. But, upon a thorough and impartial view, it will be found, that their endeavours, instead of advancing the cause of li→ berty and truth, tend only to introduce flavery and ers ror among men. There are two parts in our nature;

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the bafer, which confifts of our fenfes and paffions; and the more noble and rational, which is properly the hu man part, the other being common to us with brutes. The inferior part is generally much stronger, and has always the ftart of reafon; which, if in the perpetual ftruggle between them, it were not aided from heaven by religion, would almost universally be vanquished, and man become a flave to his paffions; which, as it is the molt grievous and fhameful flavery, fo it is the genuine refult of that liberty which is propofed by overturning religion Nor is the other part of their design better executed. Look into their pretended truths: Are they not so many wretched abfurdities, maintained in oppofition to the light of nature and divine revelation, by fly innuendoes and cold jefts, by fuch pitiful fophifms, and fuch confused and indigested notions, that one would vehemently fufpect thofe men ufurped the name of Freethinkers with the fame view that hypocrites do that of godliness, that it may ferve for a cloke to cover the contrary defect?

I fhall close this: difcourfe with a parallel reflection on thefe three fpecies, who feem to be allied, by a certain agreement, in mediocrity of understanding. A critic is entirely given up to the purfuit of learning when he has got it, is his judgment clearer, his imagination livelier, or his manners more polite than those of other men? Is it obferved, that a mifer, when he has acquired his fuperfluous eftate, cats, drinks, or fleeps with more fatisfaction, that he has a chearfuller mind, or relishes any of the enjoyments of life better than his neighbours ? The Free-thinkers plead hard for a licence to think freely. They have it: But what ufe do they make of it? Are they eminent for any fublime discoveries in any of the arts and fciences? Have they been authors of any inventions that conduce to the well-being of mankind? Do their writings fhew a greater depth of defign, à clearer method, or more just and correct reasoning than those of other men?

There is a great resemblance in their genius; but the critic and mifer are only ridiculous and contemptible creatures, while the Free thinker is also a pernicious one.

N° 84.

Wednesday, June 17.

Non miffura cutem nifi plena cruoris hirudo.

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Hor. Ars Poet. v. ult.

Sticking like leeches till they burft with blond.

Rofcommon.

To the honoured NESTOR IRONSIDE, Efq;

SIR,

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Middle-Temple, June 12. Refuming you may fometimes condefcend to take

PRegnizance of Tmall enormities, I here lay one be

fore you; which I proceed to without farther apology, as well knowing the belt compliment to a man of bufi nefs is to come to the point,

There is a filly habit among many of our minor orators, who difplay their eloquence in the feveral coffeehoutes of this fair city, to the no fmall annoyance of confiderable numbers of her Majesty's fpruce and loving fubjects; and that is, a humour they have got of twisting off your buttons. Thefe ingenious gentlemen are not able to advance three words, till they have got fast hold of one of your buttons; but as foon as they have procured fuch an excellent handle for difcourfe, they will indeed proceed with great elocution. I know not how well fome may have escaped; but for my part, I have often met with them to my coft; having, I be lieve, within these three years last past, been argued out of feveral dozens infomuch that I have for fome time ordered my tailor to bring me home with every fuit a dozen at least of fpare ones, to fupply the place of such as from time to time are detached as an help to difcourfe, by the vehement gentlemen before meutioned. This way of holding a man in difcourie, is much practifed in the coffee houses within the city; and does not indeed fo much prevail at the politer end of the town. It is likewife more frequently made ule of a mong the fmall politicians, than any other body of men. VOL. II.

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I am therefore fomething cautious of entering into a controverfy with this fpecies of ftatesmen, especially the younger fry: for if you offer in the lealt to dif fent from any thing that one of these advances, he immediately steps up to you, takes hold of one of your buttons, and indeed will foon convince you of the ftrength of his argumentation. I remember, upon the news of Dunkirk being delivered into our hands, a brisk little fellow, a politician, and an able engineer, bad got into the middle of Batfon's coffee-house, and was fortifying Graveling, for the fervice of the Moft Chriftian King, with all imaginable expedition. The work was carried on with fuch fuccefs, that in lefs than a quarter of an hour's time he had made it almoft impregnable; and, in the opinion of feveral worthy citizens who had gathered round him, full as strong, both by fea and land, as Dunkirk ever could pretend to be. happened, however, unadvisedly to attack fome of his outworks; upon which, to fhew his great skill likewife in the offenfive part, he immediately made an affault upon one of my buttons, and carried it in lefs than two minutes, notwithstanding I made as handfume a defence as was poffible. He had likewise invested a fecond, and would certainly have been master of that too in a very little time, had he not been diverted from this enterprife by the arrival of a courier, who brought advice, that his prefence was abfolutely neceffary in the difpofal of a beaver; upon which he raifed the fiege, and indeed retired with fome precipitation. In the coffee-houfes here about the Temple, you may harangue even among our dablers in politics for about two butI had yesterday tons a-day, and many times for lefs. the good fortune to receive very confiderable additions to my knowledge in state-affairs; and I find this morning, that it has not flood me in above a button. In most of the eminent coffee houses at the other end of the town, for example, to go no farther than Will's in Covent garden, the company is fo refined, that you may hear and be heard, and not be a button the worle for it. Befides the gentlemen before mentioned, there are others who are no less active in their harangues, but with gentle fervices rather than robberies. These while they

are improving your understanding, are at the fame time fetting off your perfon; they will new plait and adjust your neck cloth.

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But though I can bear with this kind of orator, who is so humble as to aim at the good will of his hearer by being his valet de chambre, I must rebel against another fort of them. There are fome, Sir, that do not flick to take a man by the collar when they have a mind to perfuade him. It is your bufinefs, 1 humbly prefume, Mr Ironfide, to interpofe, that a man is not brought over to his opponent by force of arms. It were requifite, therefore, that you should name a certain interval, which ought to be preferved between the speaker and him to whom he speaks. For, fure, no man has a right, because I am not of his opinion, to take any of my cloaths from me, or drefs me according to his own liking. I affure you, the most becoming thing to me in the world, is, in a campaign periwig, to wear one fide before, and the other caft apon the collateral fhoulder. But there is a friend of mine, who never talks to me, but he throws that which I wear forward upon my fhoulder; fo that in reftoring it to its place, I lofe two or three hairs out of the lock upon my buttons; though I never touched him in my whole life, and have been acquainted with him this ten years. I have feen my eager friend in danger sometimes of a quarrel by this ill cuftom; for there are more young gentlemen who can feel than can understand. It would be therefore a good office to my good friend, if you advised him not to collar any man, bat one who knows what he means; and give it him as a ftanding precaution in conversation, that none but a very good friend will give him the liberty of being seen, felt, heard, and underitood, all at once. I am,

SIR,

Your most humble fervant,

JOHANNES MISUCHIROSOPHUS.

P. S. I have a fifter who faves herself from being handled by one of these manual rhetoricians, by giving

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