6

dred forty four Pounds, feven Shillings and nine Pence. "After this I refolv'd never to marry more, and found I had been a Gainer by my Marriages, and the Damages granted me for the Abuses of my Bed, (all Charges deducted), eight thousand three hundred Pounds within a Trifle.

་

I come now to fhew the good Effects of the Love ⚫ of Money on the Lives of Men towards rendring them honeft, fober, and religious. When I was a young Man, I had a Mind to make the best of my Wits, and • over-reached a Country Chap in a Parcel of unfound Goods; to whom, upon his upbraiding, and threatning to expofe me for it, I returned the Equivalent of his Lofs; and upon his good Advice, wherein he clearly demonftrated the Folly of fuch Artifices, which can never end but im Shame, and the Ruin of all Correfpondence, I never after tranfgreffed. Can your Courtiers, who take Bribes, or your Lawyers or Phyficians in their Practice, or even the Divines who intermeddle in worldly Affairs, boaft of making but one Slip in their Lives, and of fuch a thorough and lafting Reformation Since my coming into the World I do not remember I was ever overtaken in Drink, fave nine times, one at the Chriftening of my first Child, thrice at our City Feafts, and five times at driving of Bargains. My Reformation I can attribute to nothing fo much as the Love and Esteem of Money, for I found my felf to be extravagant in my Drink, and apt to turn Projetor, and make rafh Bargains. As for Women, I ne-ver knew any, except my Wives: For my Reader must know, and it is what he may confide in as an excellent Recipe, That the Love of Bufinefs and Money is the greatest Mortifier of inordinate Defires imaginable, as employing the Mind continually in the careful Overfight of what one has, in the eager Queft after more, in looking after the Negligences and Deceits of Servants, in the due Entring and Stating of Accounts, in hunting after Chaps, and in the exact Knowledge of the State of Markets; which Things whoever thoroughly attends, ⚫ will find enough and enough to employ his Thoughts on every Moment of the Day; So that I cannot call to Mind, that in all the Time I was a Husband, which,

6

6

'off

"off and on, was about twelve Years, I ever once thought of my Wives but in Bed. And, laftly, for Religion, I have ever been a conftant Churchman, both Forenoons and Afternoons on Sundays, never forgetting: to be thankful for any Gain or Advantage I had had that Day; and on Saturday Nights, upon cafting up my Accounts, I always was grateful for the Sum of my ← Week's Profits, and at Christmas for that of the whole "Year. It is true, perhaps, that my Devotion has not been the most fervent; which, I think, ought to be imputed to the Evennefs and Sedatenefs of my Temper, which never would admit of any Impetuofities of any Sort: And I can remember that in my Youth and Prime of Manhood, when my Blood ran brisker, I took greater Pleasure in Religious Exercifes than at pre-fent, or many Years paft, and that my Devotion fenfibly declined as Age, which is dull and unwieldly, came upon me.

་

I have, I hope, here proved, that the Love of Money prevents all Immorality and Vice; which if you will: not allow, you must, that the Purfuit of it obliges Men to the fame Kind of Life as they would follow if they were really virtuous: Which is all I have to fay at prefent, only recommending to you, that you would think of it, and turn ready Wit into ready Money as faft as you can. I conclude,

Your Servant,

Ephraim Weed]

Thursday

N° 451.

Thursday, August 7.

Jam favus apertam

In rabiem capit verti jocus, & per honeftas
Ire minax impunè domos·

T

HERE is nothing fo fcandalous to a Government, and deteftable in the Eyes of all good Men, as defamatory Papers and Pamphlets; but at the fame time there is nothing fo difficult to tame, as a Satyrical Author. An angry Writer, who cannot appear in Print, naturally vents his Spleen in Libels and Lampoons. A gay old Woman, fays the Fable, feeing all her Wrinkles reprefented in a large Looking-glafs, threw it upon the Ground in a Paffion, and broke it into a thousand Pieces, but as fhe was afterwards furveying the Fragments with a fpiteful kind of Pleafure, fhe could not forbear uttering her felf in the following Soliloquy. "What have I got by this revengeful Blow of mine, I have only multiplied my Deformity, and fee an hundred ugly Faces, where before I faw but one.

IT has been propofed, to oblige every Perfon that writes a Book, or a Paper, to fwear himself the Author of it, and enter down in a publick Register his Name and Place of Abode.

THIS, indeed, would have effectually fuppreffed all printed Scandal, which generally appears under borrowed. Names, or under none at all. But it is to be feared, that fuch an Expedient would not only deftroy Scandal, but Learning. It would operate promifcuously, and root up the Corn and Tares together. Not to mention fome of the most celebrated Works of Piety, which have proceeded from Anonymous Authors, who have made it their Merit to convey to us fo great a Charity in fecret: There are few Works of Genius that come out at firft with the Author's Name. The Writer generally makes a Tryal of them in the World before he owns them; and, I believe,

very few, who are capable of Writing, would fet Pen to Paper, if they knew, before-hand, that they must not publish their Productions but on fuch Conditions. For my own part, I muft declare, the Papers I prefent the Publick are like Fairy Favours, which shall laft no longer than while the Author is concealed.

pro

THAT which makes it particularly difficult to reftrain thefe Sons of Calumny and Defamation is, that all Sides are equally guilty of it, and that every dirty Scribler is countenanced by great Names, whofe Interefts he pagates by fuch vile and infamous Methods. I have never yet heard of a Ministry, who have inflicted an exemplary Punishment on an Author that has fupported their Caufe with Falfhood and Scandal, and treated, in a moft cruel manner, the Names of thofe who have been looked upon as their Rivals and Antagonists. Would a Government fet an everlasting Mark of their Difpleasure upon one of those infamous Writers, who makes his Court to them by tearing to Pieces the Reputation of a Competitor, we fhould quickly fee an End put to this Race of Vermin, that are a Scandal to Government, and a Reproach to Human Nature. Such a Proceeding would make a Minifter of State fhine in Hiftory, and would fill all Mankind with a juft Abhorrence of Perfons who fhould treat him unworthily, and employ against him thofe Arms which he fcorned to make use of against his Enemies.

I cannot think that any one will be fo unjust as to imagine, what I have here faid is fpoken with Refpect to any Party or Faction. Every one who has in him the Sentiments either of a Christian or a Gentleman, cannot but be highly offended at this wicked and ungenerous Practice, which is fo much in ufe among us at prefent, that it is become a kind of National Crime, and distinguishes us from all the Governments that lie about us. I cannot but look upon the finest Strokes of Satyr which are aimed at particular Perfons, and which are fupported even with the Appearances of Truth, to be the Marks of an evil Mind, and highly Criminal in themselves. Infa my, like other Punishments, is under the Direction and Distribution of the Magiftrate, and not of any private Perfon. Accordingly we learn from a Fragment of Cicero,

that

that tho' there were very few Capital Punishments in the twelve Tables, a Libel or Lampoon which took away the good Name of another, was to be punished by Death, But this is far from being our Cafe. Our Satyr is nothing but Ribaldry, and Billingfgate. Scurrility paffes for Wit; and he who can call Names in the greatest Variety of Phrafes, is looked upon to have the fhrewdeft Pen. By this Means the Honour of Families is ruined, the highest Fofts and greatest Titles are render'd cheap and vile in the Sight of the People; the nobleft Virtues, and moft exalted Parts, expofed to the Contempt of the Vicious and the Ignorant. Should a Foreigner, who knows nothing of our private Factions, or one who is to act his Part in the World when our prefent Heats and Animofities are forgot, fhould, I fay, fuch an one form to himfelf a Notion of the greatest Men of all Sides in the British Nation, who are now living, from the Characters which are given them in fome or other of thofe abomi nable Writings which are daily published among us, what a Nation of Monsters must we appear!

AS this cruel Practice tends to the utter Subversion of all Truth and Humanity among us, it deferves the utmost Deteftation and Difcouragement of all who have either the Love of their Country, or the Honour of their Religion at Heart. I would therefore earnestly recommend it to the Confideration of thofe who deal in these pernicious Arts of Writing; and of thofe who take Pleafure in the Reading of them. As for the firft, I have spoken of them in former Papers, and have not ftuck to rank them with the Murderer and Affaffin. Every honeft Man fets as high a Value upon a good Name, as upon Life it felf; anď I cannot but think that thofe who privily affault the one, would destroy the other, might they do it with the fame Secrecy and Impunity.

AS for Perfons who take Pleafure in the reading and difperfing of fuch deteftable Libels, I am afraid they fall very little fhort of the Guilt of the firft Compofers. By a Law of the Emperors Valentinian and Valens, it was made Death for any Perfon not only to write a Libel, but if he met with one by chance, not to tear or burn it. But because I would not be thought fingular in my Opi nion of this Matter, I fhall conlude my Paper with the

Words