In

what the world at large despises.* new, things he sees only antiquity deteriorated; but in old things he finds constant novelties. He chooses his books as others do their wines, the older the better, and practises the maxim of age before honesty,' with perfect consistency. He is, however, a great imposer on elderly ladies, for while they think he is partial to their conversation, he only seeks it for the sake of gaining some particulars about the last generation. He chooses his wife as one would choose a prizefighter, for her arms; and let her relations beware of him, for sooner or later they are sure to be impaled or quartered. The coat he sets most store by, is not the one he wears, but the one he bears. If he be sometimes sorrowful, at least he is never crestfallen; he would barter his very hat for a cap of maintenance, and esteems the staunchest friends to be supporters. He has but one moral precept to direct his conduct, and that is his family motto. He dwells so much among piscina and stalls, that naturalists are at a loss whether to class him among fishes or horses; and, moreover, he is so assiduous at sales, that he would make a good mariner, especially as he can make the most of old canvas. In literature he reverses the idea of perfectibility of mind, which others look forward to, but he looks backward for; thus he esteems Homer the founder of poetry, and Pope its confounder. In his opinion all our lyrical writers are flat men, when contrasted with Flatman; even the beau monde has no charms for him compared with Beaumont ; and when he was told what a strange part Alexander Fletcher had acted, he Isaid that was not the name of the dramatist. He reads no modern production but the Pleasures of Memory, and that only for the sake of its title. When some one remarked that Johnson had laid the foundation of a durable fame, he immediately replied that old Ben was brought up a bricklayer. He once declined viewing a beautiful prospect, bccause it obliged him to look forwards. Hope he never indulges in, for the same reason; except

This jeu d'esprit will probably amuse our readers, as they are able to enter into it. No personality whatever is intended; the author is himself one of the number.-EDIT.

in expectation of meeting with an editio princeps. As for his diet, old bones are meat and drink to him. So many of his books are worm-eaten, that he ought to have a constant presentiment of his own end. He demurs to the maxim of whatever is, is right; for nothing is right with him but what has been, so that he is the true laudator temporis acti. He thinks nothing truly British but what is derived from the ancient Britons; the cloth his coat is made of is genuine Saxon; and his favourite walk is along the streets of St. Clement Danes. In politics he differs entirely from the Reformers, for he knows of no repair but repairing to the auction room; and as for the Conservatives, he considers them a great deal too new, and mere supplanters of the wisdom of our ancestors. He never would sit for his portrait, because none of the old masters could be got to do it. He wears a Tompion repeater, the wheels of which want filing up sadly, but he will not have it touched, so that it is always too fast or too slow, and thus he arrives at the Bank before the doors are open, and does not come to dinner till the cloth is removed, by which tardiness, however, he just contrives to get his dessert.

When he goes a-travelling, it is either among the Bas-Bretons or the Highlanders, because they retain their primitive customs. As a specimen of his housekeeping, his library is better furnished with plates than his kitchen. His charities partake of his ruling passion, for he only relieves elderly beggars, and tells the young ones that their turn will come twenty years hence. It must not be forgotten that he is an advocate for annual parliaments, not on the ground of their being the best, but because they prevailed in former times. He always sends his parcels by the waggon, because it is the oldest conveyance, so that they generally arrive late; and whenever the wheels of a coach happen to take fire, he remarks that the packhorse's shoes never did so. He looks out the names of places in Saxton's Atlas, and his ideas of the situation of Europe are founded on the treaty of Westphalia. He is a my to novels, for their name's sake, but tolerates the Waverley ones, because they carry the reader back to the olden time. He wishes, however,

sworn ene

to substitute the Mort d'Arthur, Don Belianis, Valentine and Orson, Tristan, and the Paladins, in their stead. But with all these predilections for age, he cannot feel reconciled to growing old himself, nor was he so consistent as to marry an old wife. Although he idolizes Time, yet Time is ungratefal, and treats him with as little respect as he shows to such as profess to kill him. His great hope is, to have a niche in the House of Praise (as Davenant calls it), for Pope's Temple of Fame is much too modern for him. Therefore, let him contract with the tomb-sculptor, and the biographical dictionary maker, and so render assurance doubly sure. As we wish him well, we will propose vivit post funera virtus for his escutcheon, and as for his volumes, our kindest wish shall be, ut levis sit pulvis, which we will do our best to fulfil. CYDWELI.

2222222

Nottingham.. 2 Derby.. Leicester.. Warwick.

2

45

224

2

0

4696224

Middlesex... | || | ||

Chester.

......

CINQUE PORTS. Dover Hastings...... Sandwich.

2

Winchelsea.. Seaford.

Hythe Romney Rye....

16

1

1

2221OLOO

Oxford.

Hereford.

...

Recapitulation.

Salop.

0

Gloucester 2

3

England and

Monmouth... Stafford.

Wales......513

500

Worcester.....

6

2

Mr. URBAN, Nov. 5. THE very laudable spirit which at present animates our antiquaries and admirers of architectural antiquities, cannot be too highly applauded. The fine remains of former splendour, now in rapid decay, are not interesting from their age and beauty only, but are venerable from their association with the most important events in British history, and have become as it were national property. None, therefore, but the most unthinking and tasteless Goths can be indifferent to the propriety of taking all means for the preservation of the (miscalled) Gothic structures, reared by our pious, warlike, and hospitable ancestors; structures, more from the shameless ravages of man, than the slow effects of time, almost daily becoming reduced in number, or materially dilapidated.

When I see what is doing in England, I cannot but regret the totally neglected state in which the remaining buildings of one of the most cele brated religious establishments of Europe are now left; where, if the design is less grand and imposing than in many other similar edifices, there are yet many curious architectural details and monumental peculiarities. I allude to the ruins in the famous island of Iona, now a fashionable resort of thousands who annually visit

the impressive memorials of former ages!

The large marble altar has long since disappeared, and only as much of the monument of the Abbat Mackinnon which stood near it remains, as will serve to show its former elegance. The four beautifully sculptured lions on which the figure rested, were successively stolen, but fortunately the party were discovered in the act of carrying off the last one. The vile thieves were deprived of their booty, and the schoolmaster has since very prudently concealed the relic under his own bed, along with the remaining two Clachan brath, or stones of destiny, which so long attracted the attention of devotees.

The propensity to carry off fragments of antiquity is deplorable; and true and honest antiquaries must have often been grieved to view collections of stained glass, carved wood, sculptured stone, and similar relics, which had been shamelessly and sacrilegiously torn from churches and sepulchral monuments.

I could perceive the marks of recent fracture in several parts of the ruins at Iona, and having had the beautifully sculptured cross of Mackinnon, now prostrate, turned over, a large piece was found to have been lately detached! It is lamentable to witness this worse than Gothic, barbarous, and wanton destruction of a hallowed fane, without an effort to prevent any further desecration...

leled isle of Staffa.

A steam-boat twice a week during summer conveys tourists from all quarters, to view these interesting islands, and they are shown over the ruins by the old schoolmaster, in the usual manner of such ciceroni.

But in what state are these venerable remains? The Cathedral and Nunnery, with their surrounding chapels and dwelling-houses, are left exposed to all sorts of pollution, without a sufficient fence, to prevent even the cattle from wandering through the burial-ground, or lodging in the aisles and other recesses. The enthusiastic exclamation of Dr. Johnson when he visited this celebrated place, shows how strongly he felt on beholding the ruins of Columkil, and they cannot fail to make a similar impression on all reflecting minds. How much is it then to be lamented, that such shameful spoliation should be committed on GENT. MAG. December, 1832.

The Barons of Exchequer in Scotland have with much propriety been permitted to repair some of the principal structures which escaped destruction from the misdirected zeal of the reformers, as Holyrood and Dunferm

line abbey churches, Elgin c cathedral, &c. If it is becoming to preserve such edifices, because within their walls some of the royal line have been interred, we should think national honour was somewhat concerned in keeping, at least in decency, a place where no less than 48 Scotish kings were buried, besides many French, Norwegian, and Irish monarchs! But, alas! so little respect is now paid to this regal cemetery, that last year I found there had been an interment in the very spot, where the body of a poor cottager was laid to moulder and mix with the dust of a long and glorious line of kings! Principal Baird,